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The continuing saga of a wholly irreverent new way of reviewing albums! It's like sitting in a room with a bunch of jaded music critics and getting a snapshot of how they feel about an album. Honesty and first impressions are the key to the Bargain Basement.
(opinions expressed may not hold true after repeated listenings to albums)

32 Leaves - Welcome To The Fall

Bob
- Modern rock that does little to distinguish itself. Potential audience won't notice this, though.
Doug - Bland contemporary rock that I could take or leave. Decent enough hooks but doesn't have anything to set it apart.
Hosehead - Another pop / hard rock band that is similar to Staind, but not very original
Brewmeister Smith - Built for radio play. Competent performances and a hard rock feel. Nothing stands out.

Aneuretical - When You Were A Kid

Bob
- Pixies' dissonance beats Perry Farrell with a wet Roger Hodgson. Violent Femmes supervise approvingly.
Doug - Sounds like a less organized Modest Mouse. Pretty different and cool though.
Hosehead - Similar to Fall Out Boy in a less experienced sort of way
Brewmeister Smith - Good songs, good rhythm and interesting vocals. Guitar work falls short of the rest.

Ark - Nine Days To No One

Bob
- This stuff is supposed to be intense and powerful, so why do I keep checking my watch?
Doug - Seething with intense brutality and motion. Beautiful and devastating.
Hosehead - Terrible chords with constant unintelligible screaming, but if that's what you want…
Brewmeister Smith - Well played & produced with many influences. If I liked hardcore, this is what I'd like.

Bathtub Shitter - Dance Hall Grind

Bob
- Only the Japanese can be this crazy. Fucking hilarious and brilliant.
Doug - Okay that's just weird, guy sounds like he's castrated one minute then growls the next.
Hosehead - Sounds like Satan is trying to kill a talking chicken to a soundtrack of death metal
Brewmeister Smith - Muppets got a new metal backup band? Nonsensical, fun and worth a listen.

Bling Kong - Do The Awesome

Bob
- So this is what gay over-sexed cheerleaders sound like, I've always wondered.
Doug - Pop-y self-aggrandizing sexually charged goodness. Results may vary. Whoo! Huh?
Hosehead - Mixture of Kim Wilde, B-52s and cheerleading routines. VERY unique!
Brewmeister Smith - Fun, catchy and energetic, with just enough attitude to make it a break-out.

Boy Sets Fire - The Day The Sun Went Out & Before The Eulogy

Bob
- Bland screamo from a band that seems to have outlived its usefulness.
Doug - Poor production makes it a cacophony of a recording. Pretty sad when Demos are better than album.
Hosehead - Terrible chord progressions which ruin the entire album
Brewmeister Smith - Wah, I hate everything, so I'll make crappy music. And throw in a Motley Crüe cover.

C - Universum

Bob
- Sultry, spoken-word layering of vocals in "Expellant" makes it all worthwhile.
Doug - Rock instrumental music that ebbs and flows with grace and ease. A must hear.
Hosehead - All instrumental band which sounds like Sonic Youth minus the vocals.
Brewmeister Smith - At its best, reminiscent of 80s Rush instrumentals, without the great drum work. Otherwise, uninteresting.

Count Zero - Little Minds

Bob
- Imagine if Dave Matthews Band didn't suck. Yeah, like that. Jim White senses a presence in the force.
Doug - Folky lackadaisical rock with a decent mix of keyboards/effects. Very pleasing.
Hosehead - Electronic pop along the same lines as Butthole Surfers and Elvis Costello
Brewmeister Smith - Eclectic and appealing; not straightforward. Samples and lap steel provide good effect.

Engineer - Reproach

Bob
- About as interesting as most annual reports I guess, so at least they're being truthful.
Doug - Throat wrenching, monotonous heavy metal that doesn't veer from its draconian vein.
Hosehead - A metal head's wet dream, pure growling to a fast metal no-talent chord progression
Brewmeister Smith - Good metal musicians backing incomprehensible, unchanging vocals, masking fairly well written lyrics. Gets old fast.

The Fantastikol Hole - The Mathematikol

Bob
- Weird, French industro-death-metal with 27 tracks written for the ADHD crowd.
Doug - Virtually unlistenable. Sparse and diverse with barely any common threads or themes.
Hosehead - What the hell? Between deep growls and random noise, this was the weirdest CD ever.
Brewmeister Smith - "Interesting" experimental sound. Abbreviated tracks make it sound like someone is just playing around.

Genghis Tron - Cloak Of Love

Bob
- Basically an underdeveloped idea. Has its moments of brilliance, but falls flat just as often.
Doug - Artistic fusion of speed-metal and electronica which alternates from beautiful to unpalatable. Interesting though.
Hosehead - Wow is this unique! Metal and electronica taking turns with a pretty cool result
Brewmeister Smith - It woke me up, but wouldn't sit still while I made up my mind.

Honeyhander - Woolly Mannerisms

Bob
- Wild, dance-y and Wave-y, but the overlaid distortion should be used sparingly, not continuously.
Doug - Interesting evolution of music, sparse and chaotic, with a delicate thread of meaning.
Hosehead - Has similarities to Depeche Mode, The Cure and Radiohead with a hard edge to it.
Brewmeister Smith - Danceable post-punk tunes with distorted guitars & droning goth vocals. Not very special.

Kidder Kit - Kidder Kit

Bob
- Subdued electronica that has potential, but still has its amateur moments.
Doug - Good packaging, but horrible content. Weak effects and production.
Hosehead - Down-tempo mixture of pop and electronica that is kind of like Zero 7 or Transglobal Underground
Brewmeister Smith - What's the point, when its only possible use could be as background for something else?

Mopa - Mopa

Bob
- Bland Tool wannabe with occasionally painful vocals that sound off-key.
Doug - Production hinders the accurate translation of this bands' potential. Record it better next time.
Hosehead - Just another Nickelback wannabe with a hint of Tool in there
Brewmeister Smith - Unique heavy sound with talented musicians and vocals. Metal in ¾ kicks ass!

No Idols - Low (Swing The Pyramid Hands)

Bob
- Headache medicine. As in, the kind that gives you one.
Doug - Hardcore, heavy metal of the most intense and abrasive kind.
Hosehead - These guys know maybe 10 power chords which they play out of order to a constant scream
Brewmeister Smith - Adequate musicianship and typical hardcore vocals create unoriginal & boring tunes with expected lyrical content.

Nothing Left To Lose - The Last Battle Hymn

Bob
- A call to arms for a War of the Cross presented in a musical format. Be wary of the message.
Doug - The unrelenting drummer makes all the songs sound the same.
Hosehead - Typical punk album mixing styles of Bad Religion and Voodoo Glow Skulls minus the ska
Brewmeister Smith - Musically talented punk band, with a good vocalist. Somewhat repetitive, but very crisp.

Numbers - We're Animals

Bob
- Reminds me of Twinkie at times, but I'm not really impressed by single-chord songs.
Doug - I should like this but it just comes off as really annoying and repetitive.
Hosehead - Artsy indie pop whose songs are way too long for how plain they are. Boring.
Brewmeister Smith - Noisy, confusing, repetitive and sometimes relaxing. It can't quite decide what it wants to be.

Oxford Collapse - A Good Ground

Bob
- Sounds like a bar band in a college town; a big fish in a little pond.
Doug - Weak and slightly predictable in a hippy straining for the notes sort-of way.
Hosehead - Vocals like the Flaming Lips, and too much cymbal action, sounds like a Zildjian commercial

Pio Mazzotti - Teenie Fantastic

Bob
- Vocalist sounds like Kat Bjelland occasionally, but not as scary. Echoes of Paul Leary's guitar.
Doug - All over the place, missing discernable structure. Pieces are good, whole is lacking.
Hosehead - Too busy! Sounds like hard rock tracks which have been rearranged in the wrong order.
Brewmeister Smith - It's loud, confusing, and thoroughly enjoyable.

Pistola - Hold For Bliss

Bob
- Don't throw out the singer yet. She just needs some voice coaching. Seriously.
Doug - This band rocks. If the lead singer wasn't tone deaf, I could highly recommend it.
Hosehead - Some songs similar to Filter with a good beat, but miserable vocals
Brewmeister Smith - Great guitars and drums ruined by lousy vocals.

The Plus Ones - Oh Me Of Little Faith

Bob
- San Fran pop-rock band that brings more smarts and savy to the table than I expected.
Doug - Excellent, smooth vibes and witty writing. All around good band and album.
Hosehead - An upbeat mixture of Phantom Planet and Weezer with that California pop sound. Great listening!
Brewmeister Smith - Must hear. Addictively good, without the bad aftertaste most pop has today.

Some Girls - Heaven's Pregnant Teens

Bob
- Some decent riffs and changeups, but one song sounds much like the others.
Doug - Like a less refined The Plot To Blow Up The Eiffel Tower. This supergroup of underground bands' is hit and miss
Hosehead - Some decent punk/metal rhythms and chords, but overall kind of lame
Brewmeister Smith - Hardcore that's probably too crisp and over-produced for its own good.

Sono Oto - I'm In August Until July

Bob
- Weak, wavering vocals in a house/lounge act that I first thought a farce, but no, it's serious.
Doug - You can't get much gay-er than "Butterflies Need Mending"
Hosehead - Laid back, weak vocals, pop-ish with some jazz influence, terrible lyrics.
Brewmeister Smith - Like watching golf, it's good for napping. Light and melodic. Keep the NoDoz handy.

Terminus Victor - Under Surveillance

Bob
- Does, says, all the right things, but lacking in intensity. Turning volume up doesn't help.
Doug - Good simple licks like early Chemlab. So close to perfection, it leaves me wanting more.
Hosehead - Industrial rock similar to Nine Inch Nails which is great in places, but drags on a bit.
Brewmeister Smith - An immature Tool with a bit of Nine Inch Nails. Some good stuff here.

Tolchock Trio - Ghosts Don't Have Bones

Bob
- Jammy, acid-garage-rock with evocations of The Doors and Jefferson Airplane. Moments of brilliance, but drags in places.
Doug - Like Radiohead on drugs… well, worse drugs. Still pretty cool though.
Hosehead - Like a modern mix of rhythm and blues riffs with modern (very) alternative rock
Brewmeister Smith - Good tunes with simple production. Well packaged and entertaining with occasional, appropriately applied, dissonance.

Vorpal - An Incomplete Guide To Vorpal Music

Bob
- The endless skipping, sampling and scratching interrupts the flow so much it becomes unlistenable.
Doug - A gnarled version of Autochre, the soundtrack of a techno seizure.
Hosehead - These guys are trying to be experimental with their sounds, but ended up just being weird.

Check out last months Basement...
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