Autopilot Is For Lovers - To the Wolves

Max: It's like Akron/Family sung by female goats… at the circus. Very weird voice, I can't get past it.
Clarence: I like the gypsy music but the witchy-poo vocals left a stain on the couch.
Steven: I want to like this, but it sounds like the soundtrack to a gerbil in a man's ass.
Patty: Jello witches.

Chris Stuart & Backcountry - Crooked Man

Max: Really beautiful bluegrassy folk. Downbeat and wonderful, ancient sounding. Ultra Dorian… Low lonesome sound.
Clarence: The bluegrass is happily delivered depressing stuff. The folk is beautifully depressing harmonies. Great sound.
Steven: Traditional folky stuff that is folky and traditional.
Patty: What a bad start to the night… bluegrass on my arrival.

Common Market - The Winter's End EP

Max: Some nice, soulful down-beat hip-hop with nice music. Actual melody and mostly clever lyricism.
Clarence: I also like the bass. Street musician hip-hop. Nice stuff for having no guitar.
Steven: Good lyrical skills backed by clever tunes.
Patty: Looney Tunes stylee hip-hop. I love that he's not talking about bitches & bling & whatnot.

James Dunn - The Long Ride Home

Max: Marc Cohn channeling the spirit of Bruce Cockburn… beautiful low-beat acoustic pop. Excellent songs & production.
Clarence: Steve Earle overly sincere, but nice. 80's Springsteen, but not that bad.
Steven: We could spend all night coming up with people that this sounds like. Currently we're at 17.
Patty: This just reminds me of how catastrophic my life has become. Seger w/o any edge.

Jenny Gillespie - Light Year

Max: Heavily Joni Mitchell influenced piano and vocals. Beautiful songs with power and serenity.
Clarence: Sparse girly folk. Like a beautiful velvet poster of Unicorns.
Steven: Solid. Music that doesn't leave you wanting, but still has room to grow.
Patty: Talented sensitive woman w/ piano. Little bit of Sarah McLachlan - nothing swings and animals still need adoption.

The Great Depression - Forever Altered

Max: Grand, epic pop… like George Michael mixed all up with The Divine Comedy. Not depressing.
Clarence: Orchestrated prog-goth. Sounds like half of everything on Projekt.
Steven: I am really surprised the band name The Great Depression wasn't already taken.
Patty: Shins-ish. Decemberists-ish. Lounge-ish. Eminently forgettable.

Ernie Halter - Starting Over

Max: Soulful pop ala Ray LaMontagne, only with heavy 70's rock and disco influence. Excellent production.
Clarence: PBS blues. Amos Lee. Ben Harper. Dude has a voice that makes the ladies quiver.
Steven: The crap that musicians write & sing to sound clever & soulful in order to get laid.
Patty: Paul Rodgers. Apparently girls hook up with him because they are "ready for love".

Stephen Lynch - 3 Balloons

Max: Very, very funny & irreverent acoustic songs. Very well written, excellent playing. Well worth a listen!
Clarence: Hilarious now, I hope it holds up. Very YouTube.
Steven: Tenacious D, Jack Black stuff.
Patty: Hilarious and talented.

Matthew And The Arrogant Sea - Family Family Family Meets The Magic Christian

Max: Arrogant indie rock with artsy production and grand ideals. Beautifully Beach Boys but Flaming Lips more.
Clarence: Better than most Flaming Lips bands fronted by Neil Young.
Steven: Self-indulgent droney crapthat even musicians would have a hard time liking.
Patty: More of that Decemberists shit. Indie yodeling.

Muy Cansado - Stars + Garters

Max: Incredible alt.rock… like Orbit playing with the Pixies. Very 90s. Very guitar. Very great.
Clarence: Pere Ubu, Yo La Tengo. Loud quiet loud. Ok, but I'd rather hear The Points.
Steven: Although no one would agree, this reminds me of Everclear. Very late 90's sound.
Patty: Strong finish, good rock. A little bit of X with The Strokes.

The New Duncan Imperials - End Of Phase One

Max: When this band rockabillies, people listen… because they still rock. Tasty guitars and select drums.
Clarence: They're back! My Facebook friend Little Steven should check this out. Country garage.
Steven: I'm guessing this is much better live. The CD lacks energy.
Patty: Cake mixed with Dramarama. Too polished to be a bar band, too skimpy to get 2nd play.

Number Prophets - Simple Songs For Dangerous Times

Max: Heavy, soulful psychedelic rock with great, deep guitars and throbbing rhythms. Dangerously good.
Clarence: Proto-metal with garage vocals. Fulfilling the promise Kings Of Leon pissed away.
Steven: Good production, but the song lyrics left a lot to be desired.
Patty: Has the same preachy XTC qualities I thought Van Halen had extinguished for all time.

Peelander-Z - P-Pop-High School

Max: Toshiro Mifune fronting Ramones all Japan-stylee. The best Japunk of all time; eclipses Shonen Knife.
Clarence: Guitarwolf meets The Banana Splits. Lots of cheerleaders like a rollerblade videogame.
Steven: Japunk in Technicolor. Straight awesome!
Patty: Awesome! Tonight's winner. Velly gooood. Not only funny, but way upbeat and tight.

Christine Santelli - Any Better Time

Max: Bar rock Sheryl Crow style… rough-edged vocals on personal songs with no real commitment.
Clarence: She's been hurt… real bad. But I'd tangle with her. I think I could hurt her more.
Steven: Sophisticated truck stop whoring blues.
Patty: Bonnie Raitt. Sheryl Crow. This is what panties smell like after an engine rebuild.

Jesse Terry - The Runner

Max: Nice Nashville country/rock… nothing incredible, but a great start with great production. Find your voice!
Clarence: What WB teen opera is he on? Over-produced country pop. Set this band free.
Steven: A few okay songs amongst fluff and boredom.
Patty: Jesse Terry doesn't excrete waste.

The Von Ehrics - Loaded

Max: Tasty punk country… tons of Social Distortion influence… tons of beautiful grit and power. Incredible.
Clarence: Punk grass? Incredible drumming, hot licks and Steve Earle song. Damn straight.
Steven: Fast songs rock, slower songs not so much. FF through the first 2 songs.
Patty: Finally some alt.country w/ some bite & distortion & speed. A+ w/ chest hair.