Well, he’s back. Jason Vorhees the hockey-masked lunatic
from the infamous FRIDAY THE 13th series
is back from the 80s much like Alf. But instead of mooching
long distance phone service, he’s returned to kill more amoral
teens; this time on a spaceship in the year 2455.
The setup is that after capturing the unstoppable Jason,
authorities in the present decide that since they can’t kill
him, they’ll freeze him in a cryogenic chamber, but before
doing so Jason escapes and goes on one more rampage that kills
all but one of his captors, a young woman named Rowan (Doig),
who manages to freeze them both. Flash forward to the future,
Rowan and Jason are discovered and thawed out by a team of
researchers from Earth 2. Conveniently enough, this team includes
several horny college students, (incidentally, midriffs remain
popular in the future) practical begging to be chopped up.
From there you can pretty well imagine what happens. He comes
to life and starts killing. At this point the movie becomes
a series of gory Alien style cat and mouse confrontations
with the non-descript crew. Naturally, all of this is just
a formality to a final confrontation, and Jason makes short
work of the cannon fodder. The highlight of his spree would
probably be the impaling a marine on a giant screw.
Aside from taking him out of the woods the filmmakers have
also moved Jason into the realm of intentional self-parody.
This is particularly evident in the second half of the film
as characters start pounding out lame one-liners about getting
killed, and Jason is treated to a virtual reality room that
offers the only genuinely funny moments in the movie. The
writers seem to have ceded that they can’t really scare anyone
with this kind of crap anymore so they might as well go for
a laugh, or maybe it’s just a requirement for all post Scream
Well, what else is there to say about this film, the directing
is flat, the acting is wooden, the characters are thin even
by slasher movie standards, and the special effects wouldn’t
impress anyone who’s seen Battlestar Galactica, but
I wouldn’t say avoid it at all costs. It’s a unique opportunity
to see a movie this cheap and shameless on the big screen
nowadays. If you do go, and I’m not really recommending that
you do, try to see it drunk, late at night, with a few friends.
As homage to the great drive-in critic Job Bob Briggs,
I decided to keep a tally for those who like to know the score:
At least 25 dead bodies 4 decapitations
1 plucked eyeball 2 impaling
6 breasts robot kung fu
1 case of implied robot, human sex.
And 1 cameo from a legendary cult director, DAVID CRONENBERG