Written by: Alec Berg, David Mandel, Jeff Schaffer; based
on the book by Dr. Seuss
Cast: Mike Myers, Alec Baldwin, Kelly Preston, Dakota Fanning,
Spencer Breslin, Sean Hayes
Rating: out of 5
For me, it all started with John Goodman playing Fred Flintstone.
Others might place the defining moment a few years earlier, say when
Danny DeVito brought the Penguin to life in Batman Returns.
But no matter when it began, the trend is clearly here—Hollywood can’t
resist filming the unfilmable, bringing long-familiar animated characters
to life through expensive special effects and “perfect casting.”
Recent films have seen this trend bequeath its cinematic largesse to
the movie-going public through, among others, Patrick Stewart
as Professor X, a computer-generated Scooby-Doo, and a stolen Whoville
Christmas courtesy of Jim Carrey.
The newest addition to this
uneven list is TheCat In The Hat, which features Mike
Myers as the titular feline who unexpectedly shows up at the house
of two children (Fanning and Breslin) whose mother is
away. No one who goes to the movies should be surprised any more that
the movie looks just like Dr. Seuss’s morality play. The
bright colors and weird shapes of the town and the house are right there
on the screen, as is the talking fish (voiced by Hayes), the
two Things, and the like. But the film nonetheless feels flat, as though
all of its hyperactive visual activity is an intentional diversion from
the fact that nothing very interesting is happening on screen.
It is tempting to lay this lack
of pizzazz at Myers’s doorstep; he is in almost every scene, and
is seldom all that funny in this film. But such an accusation would
not be fair. Though it would be too much to say the Wayne’s
World star and creator is having fun with this movie, he is certainly
busting his ass. His Cat, who sounds like nothing so much as the Tin
Man from The Wizard Of Oz, does exactly what the Cat in the Hat
is supposed to do, namely wreck the house with wild abandon. But fans
of the Austin Powers series, who know what it looks like to see
Myers enjoying himself, will not find the actor’s best work here.
The ones who should be
blamed for this Thanksgiving turkey are screenwriters Berg,
Mandel and Schaffer. Dr. Seuss’s original goal was
to help children learn to read by writing an interesting story using
only 220 separate words. (Green Eggs And Ham has only 50.) While
a movie filmed along those lines would be admittedly tedious, no new
principle seems to have arisen to take its place. The film extends the
simple story to include a wholly incongruous subplot about a gold-digging
neighbor (Baldwin) who wants to marry the mother (Preston)
and send the son off to military school. Additionally, it tries to take
advantage of Myers’ extensive talent for characterization by adding
a bunch of oddball motifs for the Cat to inhabit. But the jokes aren’t
funny and the thin story, stretched to its limits, comes across as just
dull. Myers, Baldwin, and even the kids are giving their all here, and
someone spent a lot of time and money on set design, props, and makeup.
Nonetheless, it is hard not to wish that some of the effort that made
the movie look just like Dr. Seuss’s world had instead
gone into recovering that author’s sense of fun.
Take a pal and pay full price for both tickets.
It’s worth a full-price ticket.
It’s worth a matinee ticket.
Wait for video rental.
Check out the video from the library, if you must.
While we would never encourage anyone to destroy a video...