Cesium137 reviewer bashed! Our feelings are hurt.

From: TheBinary@aol.com
To: Editor@hybridmagazine.com
Subject: bad writing

Regarding your cesium137 "elemental" review. There is nothing more than bashing on this review. In fact, all this guy does is bash like a 13 year old writing for his live journal.

Do your "writers" have any real journalistic experience or training?
The author even went forward to mock their website...totally ridiculous. Let me guess, this guy is an unsigned musician. Of course!

The fact that you allow such poor writing, journalism if you will, to get through and onto your site is highly laughable.

please do yourselves a favor and hire real writers.
thanks.

We hire only the finest writers... oh no, wait... Our writers do this for free, because they love music. Our writers are entitled to their opinions just as much as wee minded people are. So why don't you come on board and write for us, so we can see how well you do, pally.

Im Not The Man You Said I Wasnt !- Daniel Johnston Confusion

From: stewielittle1963@eudoramail.com
To: Editor@hybridmagazine.com
Subject: Im Not The Man You Said I Wasnt!

Tsk, tsk, tsk!

For shame! Midway through the interview with the Frames in your latest issue, writer David DeVoe takes it upon himself to declare that [Daniel Johnston] actually played twice this year [at SXSW]. One spot in the showcase was 'Daniel Johnston' and then the next slot was 'Not Daniel Johnston'. So I have a feeling it was probably him and other people doing some other stuff. I beg to differ! I am Not Daniel Johnston, and with a simple internet search you wouldve discovered that I am a backwoods, flannel-clad, creepy-looking guy with Coke-bottle glasses who play[s] acoustic guitar (SFBG.com), and that I started using the NDJ name in 1986 [with] a parody of Daniel's Hi How Are You? album titled How Hi Are You? (donewaiting.com).

Mr. DeVoe, I am appalled! Under my real name I have been a professional music journalist for over fifteen years, and I have never made such a slipshod, unprofessional mistake in all the days of my long career (okay, thats a lie). For Gods sake, I had to miss Dramarama to play my set, and this is the reward I get?!?

David, if youd care to atone for this grievous error, which has no doubt already cost Hybrid a significant number of its more knowledgeable and hep readers, I will be glad to send you some of my recordings for your staff of reviewers to gasp and sigh over, as they vainly attempt to describe through the use of mere words the waves of utter bliss cascading across their ears. Expect a CD in your P.O. Box... sooner or later. (I would hand-deliver it to Hybrid Cinema Editor Roxanne Bogucka, since I see from your staff box that she lives in mighty Austin Texas as I do, but unfortunately the local phone book skips straight from the doubtlessly lovely Barbie Bogt to the presumably happy couple Paul 'n' Valeri Bogucki - Roxy, whaddaya think about sending an email with your address this direction and saving ol' Not Daniel a stamp, eh?

Seriously, "am" Daniel Johnston's next album "Lost and Found" is set to come out next year on the Gammon Records label with former Glass Eye co-founder Brian Beattie producing and yours truly, Not Daniel Johnston, playing drums on the track "Rock Around the Christmas Tree"! Preceding that momentous release, the tribute album "Discovered Covered: The Songs of Daniel Johnston" hits the racks later this year, featuring performances by Mercury Rev, Tom Waits, Teenage Fanclub w/ Jad Fair, Gordon Gano, Sparklehorse w/ The Flaming Lips, Beck, Bright Eyes, Vic Chesnutt, Death Cab For Cutie and many many more! (Wonder why I didn't get a call for that one...)

-KWL aka NDJ

I'd Like To Buy The World A...Revisited...

A letter from the hybrid legal team regarding the Pet Coke letter below...

Dave,

You didn't consult the far reaches of your braintrust. The man obviously wants to recycle or perhaps refine aluminum. I think that Hybrid is missing out on a huge business opportunity here. Or, perhaps he is confused. Since so much "cracking" is involved, perhaps he felt we were a "distributor" of "crack coke" of a second variety.

On second thought, maybe Hybrid should pass on this opportunity. It may involve a level of legal assistance that could be detrimental to future operations.

Earl Q. Pufnstuff, Esq.
Gladiator At Law

Saves The Day Fan Thinks We Suck...We're Devastated.

From: OffspringShorty@aol.com
To: Editor@hybridmagazine.com
Subject: i hated it

that saves the day article sucked, i love saves the day, they are a great
band, and you if you dont like it, you suck too.

Alkaline Trio: The Cure For Heartbreak?

From: danpazder@hotmail.com
To: Editor@hybridmagazine.com
Subject: Alkaline Trio Review

You sir, clearly know nothing of this band. It's not the 'whining' about girls that makes them great. It's their morbid outlook towards life. You ARE right, this band is not punk. It's emo, which, is a lot better in many ways. The Alkaline Trio is good for the heart broken. Maybe if you'd experience your heart being stabbed by a female you'd understand. But, clearly you do not.

"Their morbid outlook towards life..." Slayer has a pretty morbid outlook towards life as well. Does that make them "emo" too?

From: muwannab@hotmail.com
To: Editor@hybridmagazine.com
Subject: shut up!

hey hybrid editor,

I just read the article about truth moevement, and i thin you are full of shit. Corey Feldman is great. Js because he had a drug problem is n reason to bag on him. Stop talking shit. Later.
Pink

Yeah, it must be tough to be a has-been actor trying to succeed at being a half-assed musician. Maybe we are full of shit. BTW PINK, we loved your last album. That whole "Get This Party Started" song was pretty catchy and had us all "gettin' jiggy with it.

From: "»ÂñDrÉw¿" <aerodog19@...>
To: editor@hybridmagazine.com
Subject: Excellent Review of 'Welcoming Home the Astronauts'

i was referred by a friend to the hybrid magazine review of flickerstick's 'welcoming home the astronauts' and must say it is one of the finest, most focused and intelligent rock reviews i have ever read. congratulations on not falling in with the lazy rock critics mentioned in the review, the ones im so sick of reading at places like cdnow. in reading their reviews, it seems they hardly ever listen to the entire record concerned, and make an irresolute effort to either identify the common strains of well-known artists or overinflate their musical erudition by making comparisons to obscure artists who, by my knowledge, may or may not display any semblance of comparability to the artist being reviewed. this is not that type of review, nor is it a sugar-coated review which in avoiding all negativity is designed to draw e-mails like this out of fans of the artist like myself. this review is insightful, sheds new light on the record's influences and focus, and clearly displays a genuine effort on the part of the reviewer to present a knowledgable and substantive review. congratulations.

andrew catauro

From: loriann25@...
Subject: Flickerstick article

Thank you for the amazing article on Flickerstick. The way the author described the music and lyrics was perfect! It is one of the better written articles on the band that I have read (and I've read them all). A link to this article was just emailed to over 2500 people that I'm sure will enjoy it as much as I did! Flickerstick really is an amazing rock band and deserve the accolades in this piece. Great job!

Thanks,
Lori Norquest

A very misunderstood band. A decent album--that is before Epic got their hands on it. If we were to write the review today based on the Epic version, it probably would read quite a bit differently.

From: paul_moshay@...
Subject: solid damned interview, thx

good interview of the damned. i'm a way old punk guy, nearly 41. one of the first shows i saw was the damned first visit to LA at the starwood in late '77. seen 'em on every visit to LA since. when they finally returned at the time of machine gun ettique, they played the whisky for three nights. i went to every night. i think it was when dave first met patricia b/c i remember them being glued to each other backstage every night.

any how, it was interesting you thought to ask about the 'first' break up in '78. i'm still fascinated by how amazingly bri james wrote for the first album yet never penned another decent song....in any of his various projects (which i've bought all of) its like waaah ? how'd that happen ?!? still on that first album his guitar lines make him sound like the 'jimmy page' of punk rock, in my book.

thx.

paul / los angeles.

Wow, we thought we were old school.

Fatboy's Night Out.

To: editor@hybridmagazine.com
From: "A" <yeterh@...>
Subject: Plump DJs review by Jeff Noise

The title of their album is actually called 'A Plump Night Out' and not 'Plumps Night Out'. Though, assuming credibility is important to writers/editors etc, this must have been some British humour, no?

After reading the review, couldn't help but get the feeling that even though the Plumps are given the "biggie ups", that Fat Boy Slim is regarded as "the originator"? The only thing that can be said to that is "Please, when the heck is Norman Cook going to retire, already?".

Cheers,

A.

Nope, it was a typo. Besides, we'll never be as funny as that Benny Hill.

From: PinkMus6@...
Subject: (no subject)
To: feedback@hybridmagazine.com

who the hell wrote this shit before they went to hell.smokey robinson has got to be 1of the best singer songwritters of all time.hell what whould motown be without his legacy.shit i think if u really knew music u would know this.and when he left the miracles his music was still the shit.and as for billy griffen who in this life could have did abetter job.i mean this guy was replacing a ledgen and he come,s in with a hit record and album.billy made some pretty music.when my kids hear love machine now shit they sing louder than me.and do it baby is also a favorite of ours.so if u dont like it ha thats ok but please dont try to corupt the legacy of what these music ledgens accomplished.i think that if u think about it no songwritter writes gems their entire career.u see i love paul macartney he have written many great songs.but i cant say that his last 3 or 4 cds where great but i still love what he has done in the past.so in closing i will only say that u should RESPECT these artist .

Hey now, no need to drag Paul into this. After all, he's a ledgen you know.

>From : Julian Chan
Date: April 2, 2002

Dear Sir,

Can you supply Petroleum Coke as follows:

Specifications of Green Petcoke
TYPICAL(ASTM)
Ash (%) 1.0max
Sulfur (%) 5.0-7.0
Volatile Matter (%) 8-13
Fixed Carbon (%) 89-90(Dry basis)
Gross Calorific Value (kcal/kg) 8,200-8,500
Size Run of Coker
Nitrogen (%) 1.2-1.5
HGI 35-45
Metals (ppm)
Si 600-900
AL 300-450
V 600-800
Ni 200-300
Na 90-110
K 10-30
Ca 300-450
Fe 400-600
QUANTITY: 5000MT

If you can supply, Pls
1) Quote CFR XIAMEN, CHINA
2) Supply 5kg sample by analysis

Waiting your reply.

Best Regards,
Julian
---

I think it's pretty safe to say, none of the braintrusts at hybrid HQ have even the remotest idea what the hell you're talking about. One thing is certain, whatever the product it is, it sounds just plain yicky.

From: Thrubeingkool182@...
Subject: saves the day

they arent pop-punk or punk or any thing else except EMO the band doesnt even
liked being called punk just to let yall know

EMO...as in Phillips? What's he got to do with this? No offense, but he creeps us out a wee bit.

Same Kid, More Vitriol...

From: Thrubeingkool182@...
Subject: saves the day

THIS REVIEW ON CHRIS CONELY IS BULL SHIT CHRIS IS THE BEST FUCKIN VOCALIST IN THE WORLD AND DESERVES MORE RESPECT THEN THIS AS A MUSCIAN(Conley employs many of the mannerisms preferred by many of the genre’s vocalists (frequent scoops and bends, a raw vulnerability, the sound of a man with a fist clenched earnestly over his heart), but he doesn’t quite have the pipes for it, so his notes seem to come most often from his sinuses and throat, with no lungs behind them. This weakness persists throughout the record and detracts from even the strongest tracks on the record.)

Thanks chief. We'll send an apology letter to his vocal coach.

Politics Aside...What'd You Think Of The Movie?

From: malocs@...
Subject: Clinton Davis

Dear Hybrid / Editor,

I am a loyal follower of your online magazine. I visit the site at least once a day in order to get the latest on music and cinema news.

I have always been impressed with the cinema reviews offered by your magazine in the past. I have found them to be objective and accurate.

I am writing this email to complain about one review in particular -- The Collateral Damage review written by Clinton Davis. I believe that I should be able to read an objective review without being pounded by "Bleeding Heart" Liberalism socio-economic beliefs. If I wanted to hear that we as Americans are "BAD" people and we deserve the attacks of terrorists I would turn on the nightly news.

I am sick of hearing that we should be ashamed of being Americans. I know that our country makes mistakes. I know that our foreign policy is not 100% fair and objective. I also know that Liberals do not like Conservatives and Conservatives do not like Liberals. However, I do not know why these political issues are a factor in Clinton's review of Collateral Damage. Maybe it's his namesake, hmmmm......

Listen, Collateral Damage may be a "bad" film. It may not have any substance at all. The acting may be terrible, etc... Just give me your opinion on the film and spare me the political propoganda. I haven't any time for it.

Thanks for this forum to vent.

--Vince Manalo

We're here for you man. By the way, who did you vote for?

Damned If You We'ren't Dead-On Mr. Sowell !

From: andrea_payton@...
Subject: Queen Of The Damned

Dear Mr. Sowell,

Thank you very much for your opinion of the Queen. I will definitely not spend my precious money going to the movies to see it. I would also like to add that I find your reviews very interesting. I have learned to take your opinion to heart, you do have very good taste in movies. Again, Thank You!

Andrea Payton :)

Save your money, wait till it comes out on DVD.

Another Nirvanna-Be...

From: MGrzesiak@...
Subject: "Nirvana Sucks and So Do You" : feedback

This 'article' written by Mr. Dashevsky is horrible. Rambling on about grunge, on hair bands, finally on the "saviors of Rock" all lead to my conclusion that Mr. Dashevsky has not an argument or a conclusion.

Peace,
Mike Grzesiak

Seemed pretty straight-forward to us, chief. Nirvana was a great band but for the love of Pete, get over it already. Cobain's not coming back.

C'mon Man, They're Old School...

From: mcnevan@...
Subject: Thousand Foot Krutch review!!!

it's obvious by reading this Thousand Foot Krutch review that your knack for spotting a diamond in the rough is weaker than your website. TFK has a massive underground following that's definetly not just "Christian" based. If you did your homework(checked out the site, etc), you'd know those songs were written 3-4 years ago, the record got held up for release for nearly two years. So before you go drooling your useless cocky opinions you should have realized that "When in Doubt", that blink 182 song as you called it, was written before Blink had even heard of a radio single. It always kills me how you cheesy reviewers see Hip Hop and Rock fused, and instantly credit Limp Bizkit! That's so sad man, Krutch was fusing the two before the first Rage (RATM) record came out!!! So, before you say Carbon Copy, learn how to say "I'm an idiot". Also, I forgot standing up and representing what you believe in isn't the "in thing" to do, maybe you should stick to bands like N 'Sync who aren't sure what they represent, they'll have to ask their manager. I know "Christ" and New Rock don't go hand in hand, but ask yourself who're the rebels here? Who's not babbling about Sex, drugs, and rock 'n' roll and having to put a little thought into it, knowing that as "Christians" in a band, they're immediately going to have to work that much harder to stick it out. Please think a little more next time before you start talking with your head in the clouds, don't be so afraid of what you don't understand, it could change your life!!!!!

Tristan.

First of all Tristan, breathe--it'll all be okay little brother, really. N'Sync?! What the hell are you talking about chief? You've got to be kidding right?! Okay, so we're the one's with our "head in the clouds" and presumably guilty of not knowing of whence we speak. Right. You think we cover N'Sync?! Beautiful. Listen, if your boys in Thousand Foot Krutch didn't provide us with such lyrical gems as, "Everybody, shake your body, lift your hands, stop frontin' your (sic) just a puppet." they'd probably be taken a little more seriously. We'll send a memo to those crazy kids in Rage and let them know they owe a debt of gratitude to TFK. BTW, "I'm an idiot"...that's not very Christian-like...we're telling King Diamond on you. On behalf of hybrid, tell the other two kids in the TFK fan club we're sorry, we honestly had no idea you were so old school.

Patton Pending...

From: paddler33@...
Subject: Patton Interview

Dude, why did you publish this interview? It might be the most strained interaction between 2 people ever documented. There is no reason for this to live beyond the moment. I'm sure both parties involved must have walked away trying to figure out what happen and why... Please don't waste my time, and ever other Patton fan with such uninformed garbage. This is insulting on many levels. I really hope this is is not indicitive to the overall quality of work in you ezine.

Regards,
Mikeg

Did we bug ya'? Didn't mean to bug ya'.

Boy Hits Car, Sets Fire To Self...

From: BoyHitsCarBenkei@...
Subject: Boy Hit's Car Review

Amazing review, one of the best I've ever read for an album that is so hard to put into words, Ewan Wadharmi did a great job, except for he called the Boy Hits Car review a debut, which it is not. They had another album out before the self titled, called My Animal, though you can only find it from www.cdlps.com since its not in print anymore. Anyone who likes the BHC album should check it out.

Katie

You're scaring us. You know entirely too much about a band that in five year's time people will likely confuse with Boy Sets Fire. Thanks for the props though. You're super neato.

The Day The Mountains Stumbled...

From: ruth@coo..
Subject: The Day the Mountains Stumbled.

Really great piece.

I was in Manhattan that day and he's really captured the feeling I had. Thanks for printing it.

Ruth Waytz

We agree. Probably the best piece we've ever printed to date.

To The Col-Trained Ear...

From: columbia-fats@...
Subject: STATEMENT BY J.COLTRANE

John Coltrane once said that Albert Ayler played the music that he was trying first. But after (he) Trane had learned it well, he said he could play it better and cleaner. Just think if Ayler and Trane were still here,where Jazz would be today. I was into Tranes playing and a year before he died he played harmonic solo's and was saying something. It is too sad that he never recorded these harmonic (subtone)solo's. This was some real different shit. Man, this man was playing subtone solo's".

John Bender (Ohio)T-sax
Cleveland area.

What do you think Trane and Ayler would make of the watered down Jazz stylings of ass-clowns like Kenny G?

Ewan Wadharmi, Tastemaker Extraordinaire...

From: SenseiAllularAFI@...
Subject: AFI - The Art Of Drowning review

Did the person that reviewed that have any taste at all? Just wondering..

We're not sure, hold on. Hey Ewan, here, taste this would ya?

Amnesiac...What Was Your Question Again?

From: Maniak@
Subject: amnesiac

hey im readin all these articles about radioheads amnesiac being fantastic and similar to the bends. I loved pablo honey, the bends and o.k computer as they were a mixture of heavy songs with lighter tuneful songs. for example just and no suprises. They sounded cool, like a rock band should. Then came kid A and i quite dissapointed with that as i heard distorted elecrical songs like idioteque which are awful and arnt radiohead. Not to mention on kid A guitar tunes were nearly non existant. Then came amnesiac, i was very disapointed. Songs like pakt like saridines in a crushed tin box and pull revolving doors are awful and contain horrible electrical sounds. One or two songs i liked like the pyramid song (again no guitars) . But there was no mixture just soft or electrical songs. I just wish they would produce more songs like just and karma police.

thanks
what do u think??
please reply
chris

It was like a good movie: we laughed, we cried...it changed our lives.

From: THourigan@...
Subject: Review of Bands on the Run

Broke Bands On The Run To Obscurity.

Whomever,

Regarding a guest column by Michael Kirschmann:

Funny unny, yet absolutely true! I wish the work of a indie/self-promoting bands would chronicle their falures and obscure successes more frequently on shows of this sort. It makes me feel so much better about my decision to be a carpenter.

Tim Hourigan,
Bass Player/Carpenter

We feel your pain. Our mom's still have their fingers crossed that we will get real jobs someday.

Oi! You Even Listening?

From: ginbo@...
Subject: The Templars

I just read your review of The Templars album Chansons de Geste. I am not a skinhead, but most of the music I listen too is Oi! or streetpunk. When I read that "in much of Oi there are racist overtones, or even themes for that matter," I was appaled. Thinking over all the bands I listen too, from the great old-school oi! bands to the new, I cannot think of one racist band besides Skrewdriver. I know that they are out there, but I have yet to encounter any. I am not one to put a low lable on racism, either. I am one a fierce advocate of racism and any system that upholds the systems of oppression. I know that alot of Oi! is nationalistic, and I regret that, but to hear any sort of protest song against the oppressive tactics of the U.S. government, whether against workers rights encrochment, racism, or sexism, is enough to make me listen and appreciate the music.

Eduardo Gabrieloff.

Oi! We're not skinheads either chief, but we play them on television. BTW, what the hell is streetpunk and is it more or less brutal/visceral than grass punk?

Here Today, Red Tomorrow.

From: jpabon@...
Subject:

I think Tyler Jacobson's review of The Young Dubliners album "RED" was way off base. Granted the true glory of the band is very hard to capture in a studio.....but perhaps he should here the Band live, then listen to the album again.

Help us out, how exactly does one "here" a band live? We're still trying to explain that one to Jacobson.

More Love For Ewan...

From: prothberg@...
Subject: Loveletter From Patti Rothberg

Dear Mr. Whadarmi,

Thanks to YOUR help, I have finally tasted my very first blight.(not) It went down well with all the twinkies and Oreos. You are obviously an accomplished...sit com fan? I read your letter because it was marked as a love letter, but something tells me that you are being sarchastic. Subtle. Unlike some people I (thankfully) don't know, I try not to use the word love so lightly. You seem like you're a cheezy asshole.

sincerely but not lovingly,

Patti

PS.Cuddling is obviously not something you are given the opportunity to do very often.

Ewan...sarcastic?! Naw, really? You think so?

Yep, They Still Suck...

From: teerawk@...
Subject:

First of all, it's very obvious you don't know your head from your rectum, cuz' the TFK album is an extremely solid indie effort. TFK hardly comes off sounding like limp Bizkit. Fred durst could'nt rhyme if his life depended on it, plus TFK has been fusing Hip-hop with Rock variations for the past 6 years, before Fred got his first rhyming dictionary. Secondly, DJ Dove is nuff respect, one of the biggest rejects in the Christian industry, so that shows how much you know. He had a few jams in like '95, and he never had anything to do with the production on TFK's album, he threw his name in for credibility. So before you go throwing your useless opinions around, why don't you get your facts straight!!! If you think Fred Durst is a real emcee, then that says a lot for the staff at Hybrid who hired a clueless guy like you to write their reviews. And to make a stab at them or underrate them as a band because they're Christians, or comparing them to P.O.D.? Gimme a brake man, that's weak. TFK are a very talented band who can pull off a variety of musical styles, not the same one every song( Limp Bizkit). Maybe next time you should listen to the c.d's before you review them. Whatever. Hybrid who????

Tristan...chief, we get it, you don't like us. They still suck, man.

Can You Say Enlightenment?

From: RadioFloyd01@...
Subject: Herrera Review of Kid A

How does it feel to wake up half a year later and realise how wrong you were about Kid A? I remember the first time my freind and I heard the album. It was the day it was released and we were overjoyed to be confronted with the opportunity to go and pick up our very own copy immediately after school. After we purchased our respective copies, I popped my copy in my care stereo. To say the least we were horrified. We turned to look at each other at the same instant when the music started. It was such a shock. We both scrambled to find the package to make sure we bought the correct album. Sure enough, staring bright-eyed back at us was KID A. Make no mistake about what album it was. We decided to give it a few days to grow on us. Grow on us it did. I have yet to put it down.

Yeah, you and millions of us other Radioheadz that were expecting O.K. Computer Part II.

The Cannibal Run...

From: clintbishop@...
Subject: The Amnesiac Review

Of course Knives Out is about cannibalism. "So knives out/cook him up/don't look down/shove it in your mouth." Duh.

Our bad...what the hell were we thinking.

Kid Tested....

From: clintbishop@...
Subject: The Get Up Kids

Fucking suck

Thousands of screaming adolescent emo kids can't be wrong, Clint.

Alblum Pabulum...

From: ilovemanychicks@...
Subject:

Whoever wrote that article on 6 gig diserves to get their ass kicked and their face punched in. You are the biggest piece of fucking shit ever! They are the best band in the entire world. Studio tricks? Suck a COCK! I have seen the band live 3 times and they do all that shit for real. That is the best alblum rock and roll has seen in a long time! I don't think there will ever be a greater alblum made, except when 6 gig makes another alblum! Walter Craven is the most talented song writer right now, I don't think we will ever see better. You should stop writing reviews because it is obvious that you have no idea what the fuck you are talking about! You are a donkey raping shit eater, testicle shitting rectal wart, and you fuck your dad in the ass!

SUCK A COCK!!!

More like, whoever assigned "whoever wrote that article" on that steaming pile of feces you call an "alblum", should "get their ass kicked and their face punched in." Another thing, Walter "whatever the hell his name is" is the best song writer--ever?! Are you fucking high, chief? Step away from the crack pipe, brother man.

The Sum of Britney's Boobs...

From: NXDFreak1085@...
Subject:

That review sucked ars! SUM 41 is great! Your weird! Sorry its not your kinda music! But SUM 41 cant be BRiTNEY SPEARS!

Our weird what? BTW, you saw what modern medicine did for Britney's boobs right? Anything is possible.

The Moron The Merrier...

From: SeekMyPart@...
Subject: (Kein Thema)

Fuckin' morons.. go and listen to some music that's more appropriate for your intellectual level. I'd suggest Crazytown.

Mmmkay. What the hell are you talking about chief?

Dexter and Davey, Sitting In A Tree...

From: nuthing@...
Subject: AFI Review

this was a complete bull-shit review, if anyone with half a mind reviewed AFI, they would also look at his progress through-out the music industry, and for a matter of fact, davey and dexter holland are friends, and if ur gonna claim davey sounds like a 12 year old, look at dexter too, great artists who influence each other, why else would dexter cover total immortal? check your music then your head who wrote it...

If you can't dazzle them with brilliance, baffle them with bullshit. Works everytime...right, chief?!

Just Kiddin'...

From: ZOLI27@...
Subject: About Kid A Review

I just read your review of Radiohead's Kid A, I only wish that I had read it before I forked out about $24.00 for it. I am so deeply disappointed with this CD, although I didn't expect another Bends or OK Computer I was deeply depressed after listening to it. You are absolutely right, I believe that the album is really pretentious. I hate the preachy mini art book comes with the CD. I wish I'd seen this review 48 hours ago.

Suzan Gutierrez
Ventura , Ca.

If you've read the Amnesiac review. Boy, are you gonna be pissed. Took me two years to realize just how wrong I was. --DH

Same Kid, Still Enlightened...

From: Julian.Eriksson@...
Subject: Kid A Review

Hallo,

I have just read Dave Herrera's review of Kid A and I couldn't resist a burst of spleen. It is a pity it's the first thing I've read in hybridmagazine, because although it's set up as a typical "don't believe the hype" piece, it's a dull piece of writing, which from its uninspired thinking, it should be no surprise that it misses the boat on Kid A. OK, so not every review can be prescient, passionate or plain agree with every music obsessed punter out there. Maybe its just because I'm a long time David Bowie fan, but I have come to love artists who continually strive to perversely and restlessly change their musical approach, often to much disappointment of various expectations. To write off Kid A as a slavish piece of wankery, a forsaking of songwriting to try-hard dithering with electronica is to have been stopped at first base. This is the first base where music journos sat confused and disappointed when Bowie, in collaboration with Brian Eno, released his beautifully cold and abstract pieces from 1977 Berlin so soon after such funky white soul as contained in his 1976 Stationtostation album. Yet the real emotional and stylistic power of these albums has been felt (and was felt at the time by those prescient enough) ever since through synth pop and electronica in general, a 'techno' genre which is seen as without emotional resonance only by retrograde old punks and hippies. Kid A has a stark and intelligent beauty that has the intensity of opaque poetry like William Blake: childlike poses, sometimes seemingly obscure and fragmented, but once you read his extended pieces on his broad spiritual vision, you see just how intricate and meaningful his vision in all his poems is. The extended collation of ideas and passion that is in the booklet which is hidden in the back of the Kid A CD gives such form to the sensations and ideas which has been flowing forth ever since I listened to Kid A.

Never mind a years time, Dave Herrera, the boat is leaving now, not just for one perhaps overambitious "rock" album, but a whole openness of perception which would be essential for any serious music lover. Anything else really is destined for the bargain bin of ideas.

Julian Eriksson

Think I've already covered this one. --DH

J Noise His Shit...

From: Diane Nunley <waynun@...>
Subject: To: J Noise

You Sir, have written one of the most accurate and "on the money" articles on my favorite band, SELF, that I have read since 1995. Believe me, I have read many. I did really like Subliminal though. Thank you for listening more than once. That is something that all of SELF's fans have to do. Matt Mahaffey is a wizard when it comes to recording. I read your article more than once too. Found something new every time.

Thanks,
Selfanatic

Aw, shucks maam.

Porno For Chadbo...

From: Eve Reynolds <evearch@...>
Subject: Kanary's Porno Church of the Ugly Man From:

I usually don't stoop so low as to respond to a lashing, but I'm sure I'm in good company here. Referring to your so-called review of Kanary's cd Porno Church of the Ugly Man, I would suggest that you might in the future have a reviewer who is able to listen with an open mind to hearing what is actually on the disk. Uh, sorry "Chadbo" that you have a problem getting it up, but the review is, after all, supposed to be about the music.

Eve Reynolds (real name)

Duly noted. BTW, we've sent Chadbo a bottle of viagra--thanks for the heads-up, we had no idea.

Smokin' Dem Tweeds...

From: sillyape@...
Subject: Your column... questions answered!

Mark,

LIked your column about marijuana and it's wonderful products recently. I had no idea that Colorado was leading the pack in smokin' dem tweeds. I would have thought Washington or Oregon would top out the list, as the stuff is pretty much everywhere here. There's no such thing as a pre-employment drug screen in Seattle, as no one would be employed. tee hee.

Now. You had a little concern about the 'food grade methyl paraben' in your Jah Rastafari shampoo. Have no fear:

Methyl Paraben is a fine, white methyl-compound (containing no alcohol) which is extracted from blueberries (or may be artificially synthesized) and acts as a bonding agent as well as an anti-fungal and natural preservative. It is used widely in foods and pharmaceuticals and is generally recognized as a safe food additive and preservative.

Ahh... blueberry extract. Now go hug a tree!

So much for the perception that stoners have a hard time retaining information. Dude, B-Real would be proud. FYI: Mark is already well on his way to becoming a full-fledged tree hugger...no need to incourage him.