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The Beanweevils
The Beanweevils
Weed


After vainly trying to get past the red rope at the more desirable San Fran clubs, my Filipino headbanger friend Dean Martin and I relegated ourselves to our favorite pastime of harassing hookers. Well an hour or so of shouting out, "Five dollars for me and my friend!" can make a hooligan a might peckish. So we hit the drive-thru and continued prowling. As weíre searching for more wayward ladies to set straight, we rolled past the most shockingly hideous mini-skirted toll troll I have ever seen in my life. This woman looked like she had just beaten someone to death with her face and then eaten them. Time slowed so that we could memorize the agonizing sight. Pie eyed, with my mouth full of hamburger sammich, I realized I was about to miss the opportunity of a lifetime. Looking for an assist from Deano, I saw that his mouth was also full, and agape with disgust. And then we heard it. From somewhere out of what passed for this Sleestakís face came, "Those are the two ugliest motherfuckers I have ever seen!" Well that was it; we shot our load, spewing whopper all over the interior of the car.

I like to think that the song "Plak!" is about that horrible whore, since the local is accurate down to the cross-street. This tale of a discharged vagina is sort of the response to "Detachable Penis" [King Missile]. Slow mild funk backs cute double entendres while clever cartoon vocals make smart harmonies. Itís inline with the stuff Pfilbryte puts out, but more successful here. The fast-paced "Sherry" on the other hand, doesnít have the story to back it up and therefore comes across as one hairy areola joke stretched too far. Paul Kirkís happy bass is the highlight. With Kelly Amthor in the sidecar it sounds like Richard & Mimi Farina electrified. Musically, "Take A Bus" brings back 60ís collegiate groups like The Association. The chorus, "You know full well that thatís a crock of shit" recalls the old-time favorite "Shaving Cream." "Notice Me" is more lyrically innocuous. Very upbeat with warm lounge-jazz guitar work from David Graham. Kirk sounds a lot like singer/producer Jim Greer on a fun tour of mall dwelling suburbanites called "Sucker" Itís like a preview of upcoming shows on the WB. The Mitchell Brothers are gonna be pissed about the biting commentary in "Strip Club". The hilarious lyrics "Abscessed tits" and "She used to have a dick and a ballsack like her dad" could get The Beanweevils whacked. (Or included in the settlement.) The Primus inspired "Deadhead" is as boring as the burnout they sing about. But the Steve and Edie styling of "Everybodyís Out To Fuck You" is super cool. Amthor sings more dirty words very sweetly, and Kirk proves that he can really sing when heís trying to cheese it up. He slips back into nasal Barnes & Barnes goofiness on the junkie tale "Iím Sooo Happy". Thereís a nice 60ís throwback on the organ and sleazy bass that could have been explored more. And although "Hello My Friend" isnít Neil Diamond, it takes on an unexpected seriousness. With the juvenile antics put aside, the bland Oasis sounding tune slips into mediocrity.

A lot of work went into making the production clean on these dirty songs. And itís a refreshing irreverence. But the musical talent seems misused on sub-par material. Overall it feels The Beanweevils prefer yelling at streetwalkers more than striving to get into the good clubs.

On a scale of SF gentlemenís clubs: If Market Street Cinema is a one and Chez Paree is a ten, The Beanweevils rates a six, Crazy Horse.

ó Ewan Wadharmi

Track Listing:

  1. Take A Bus
  2. Plak!
  3. Sherry
  4. Notice Me
  5. Sucker
  6. Strip Club
  7. Deadhead
  8. Everybodyís Out To Fuck You
  9. Iím Sooo Happy
  10. Hello, My Friend

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Mike Doughty



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