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Canada is a place of mystery to Upper-Middle Americans. It's
a frosty wonderland of French-speaking NTO protesters, the native
land of comedians, the birthplace of D.O.A. (the Canadian
ones) and Subhumans (the Canadian ones.) A marvelous place
where music television means music videos rather than insipid
reality shows about rich 16-year old girls. And it is the natural
habitat of the Nardwaur, the most annoying mammal in North
America . Boasting a Prince Valiant haircut and squeaky
voice, The Nardwaur is related to the Peter Pan Pixie of Pixyland.org
fame, except that it performs ambush interviews on Muchmusic.
Surprisingly, when the hairy-chested Nardwaur fronts The Evaporators
(the Canadian ones,) it's no more irritating than say…The
Dickies or Vandals. Once the high-speed classic punk
and garage rock silliness kicks in you're hooked. The Smugglers'
David Carswell is a brilliant guitarist. More Joey Santiago
than Yngwie Malmsteen, he utilizes masterful tones playing
just the right notes. Nardwaur (real name Nardwaur the Human
Serviette) fancies himself a historian of punk (the Canadian
ones.) Tidbits of local legends serve as lyrical clues like a
bizarre version of National Treasure letting us in on the
inside joke. And offhand onstage comment from The Pointed Sticks
becomes a self-abusive dance sensation "Do the Eggbeater."
In a scene worthy of a Cremaster movie, an incident on
the 21 Jump Street set involving testicle stapling delivers
the punchline, "Where's the Butterknife?" "What
if I Care About the People Who Live in the Seas Around Me?"
features a sweet hippy sentiment, an even sweeter organ warble
and Carswell picking out a buzzy Flaming Lips riff. Several
notable figures from Vancouver's rich past share time with tabloid
subjects Sasquatch and lunar conspiracy theorists. These catchy
tunes will visit you on a rotating basis like a festive spectre
bent on instilling the Christmas spirit.
Joyful videos of keyboard surfing and superheroes only exacerbate
the stupidly giddy fun. Nardwaur riles crowds up with his endearingly
retarded enthusiasm. The band and one fem-tard demonstrate more
national pride than the combined cast of The Red Green Show.
The Evaporators more than make up for foisting Martin Short
on us.
-Gus the Talking Mute
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The
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