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Various Artists
Redefine The Rockstar: Volume 2
3:16 Productions

As this disc starts, it's hard not to want to make it stop. The hard rock bullshit of "Rise and Fall" by Fallen is 4 minutes and 48 seconds of my life that I really want back. Sorry guys, Monsters of Rock was a few years ago. In fact, the waste of time, nostalgia waxing, metal nonsense continues until we get to a pretty good punk track by 5 Cent Deposit called "Things Ain't Fine." Now, I'm really fucking confused. Is this a punk compilation fallen flat on its face or a metal compilation that decided to put in punk as filler? This track could easily get lost among the rest of this uninteresting hair band musical vomit.

The next song is just a laughable power ballad by a band called Living Proof. Following this is just more stereotypical loser metal by Charnel House. When you say the title of their song, you have to use your scary voice... say it with me.. "Tale of Murder." There's a bit of relief with next track, "Canal Street" by Sax9. I have a feeling this is only a temporary moment of joy. The problem here is that I'm not sure if this band is really good or just good in comparison.

Continuing with being just weird and having no guidance, we find out what it would've sounded like if Spandau Ballet and Talking Heads had a child with Dead Emotion. Disturbing. Very Disturbing. Now we have pretty punk with Powersurge (Use your Monster Truck announcer voice when you say their name). At this point, Redefine The Rockstar: Volume 2, is more like a bad car crash than an album. I can't quit listening because of how badly compiled this album is and the total lack of substance and quality in the chosen artists. The next band is called Salted Wounds. Metallica called, they want their sound back.

I want to end this review, but a strange force is begging me to go on... can't... resist. "Inferno" by Xashinto. I've heard people be blatant rip-offs of Rage Against the Machine before, but these guys take it to a whole different label. I only thought I'd heard people rip them off before, but this is the real deal.

"Handful of Nightmare" by Milgasm might have been a good song if they weren't singing flat (that'll come back to haunt them in the years to come). The music is remarkably stupid and redundant. Now, we've got "Blame" by... The Blame. I guess it's not bad, but I think my standards have dropped severely within the last few minutes. I can't quit the review with only 6 songs left.

"Shadow (Radio Edit)" by Witness Relocation Program--I understand the radio edit. There was probably a huge demand from radio stations nationwide to get a shorter and cleaner version of "Shadow," y'know, with unknown hair bands making a huge comeback and topping all of the charts.

Darling Demonic... fucking please. I just can't by this "evil" thing at this point; especially when it sounds like it's been mixed by Helen Keller. "Spineless" by D-ZL sounds like the lyrics were written by a pissed off 14-year-old. "Punk ass freak, you should be put to sleep" repeated 4 times - I'm not kidding.

Like I said before, I'm no longer in a position to determine if what I think is good is actually good, but "21" by Putrid Flowers doesn't sound half-bad. I'll have to give it another listen after I listen to some Fugazi.

Oh my God, save me, please!!! Synthesized funk in the form of "Asgardian Jam" by Forgotten Gods. THERE IS NO DIRECTION AT ALL. I'm getting sick from all of the flip-flopping. "Straight Jacket" by Law Byting Citizen is mediocre punk rock. I dunno, maybe it's good. I just don't know anymore. Now there's rapping that sound like Stan Ridgeway. On the back of Redefine The Rockstar it says Special Thanks to You for listening. Fuck that. 3:16 Productions now owes me those minutes of my life back. You don't have enough to pay me for listening to this entire album. This has got to be the worst compilation of all time.

-Vic Trella

Track Listing:
1. "Rise and Fall" - Fallen
2. "Dishwasher" - Life of Riley
3. "Here Come The End" - Orcus
4. "Fred" - Obsidian
5. "Gravel" - SOS
6. "Things Ain't Fine" - 5 Cent Deposit
7. "Loneliness" - Living Proof
8. "A Tale of Murder" - Charnel House
9. "Canal Street" - Sax 9
10. "Nothing To Die For" - Dead Emotion
11. "Time and Place" - Powersurge
12. "Dead Alive" - Salted Wounds
13. "Inferno" - Xashinto
14. "Handful of Nightmare" - Milgasm
15. "Blame" - The Blame
16. "Shadow (Radio Edit)" - Witness Relocation Program
17. "99 Fulton Ave" - Darling Demonic
18. "Spineless" - D-ZL
19. "21" - Putrid Flowers
20. "Asgardian Jam" - Forgotten Gods
21. "Straight Jacket" - Law Byting Citizens


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